On the train. Settling in, dig out the iPad, start to read. The man next to me is curious, looks at the iPad (I'm reading in English of course). This is what I hear in the conversation he initiated:
Man: You (garble blah blah garble)
Me: My China Chinese talk not good.
Man, poking me in the arm: You (garble garble blah garble)?
Me: My China Chinese talk not good.
Man: No, your Chinese is good!!!
Me: not good, not good.
Man, poking me more intently in the arm: You (garble garble blah blah)?
Me: Beidaihe. (name of city where I'm going--random guess of question he's asking.)
Man: You what garbled garbled?
Me: I don't understand. I not talk.
Man, poking me again: You what garbled zou?
Me: Teacher. English.
Man: Garbled garbled garbled garbled what?
Me: .... (blank expression, I didn't get a word of this)
Man, speaking very intently, GARBLED GARBLED GARBLED WHAT?
Me: I don't understand...what?
Man repeats same phrase even more intensely, and I still can't catch a word other than the word "what" at the end.
Lady on the opposite side of the aisle, in much clearer Chinese: We are Chinese. You are what?
Me: AH! I am American!!
Six people who are eavesdropping all smile at us, including the lady with the clearer Chinese. Suddenly I have six new friends! Whom I can't talk to!!
This is why I MUST learn this language if I'm going to keep living here. Not even including the time in the grocery story today, trying to remember the packaging of the shampoo, discreetly trying to open the top of the bottle to see if it is indeed shampoo or if it's in fact conditioner, when I am suddenly accosted by two women who are using their body language and possibly their words to tell me I CANNOT buy the bottle I am holding. In frustration, I set down the bottle of stuff (shampoo? conditioner? body wash?) and walked away without buying anything.
I love how Chinese people are so willing to try, so appreciative of the smallest effort. I love how they persist, even when I've made it clear several times that I do NOT speak their language, and I am clearly NOT communicating. I hate how after months of living here I still can't even defend myself in almost every basic situation (except taxis and ordering my four favorite Chinese dishes: I can do that), how I have to pre-plan every step and print out notes, Chinese, and use hand gestures and grunts when my careful planning inevitably fails. Ask that I can find a better way this semester to study Chinese so that I can connect here better.
